The Road

I received a call from my good friend who has a sister with kidney failure and in need of a heart transplant. The doctors are moving forward with her testing so that she can donate her kidney to her sister. They wanted to wait initially because of the heart problems, but she needs the kidney transplant soon. My friend is brave. I am excited for her. The experience is something you never forget. From the beginning to the end. I anticipated that day and was eager that morning to get it over with so my husband could be healthy again. I am sure that she has that same feeling. It is a difficult task to watch your loved one ill. As my friend continues on this journey, I wish them much love, peace, health and happiness. I know that it will all work out and God will bless them.

Just thinking

With the Susan Komen Cancer Walk approaching I'm thinking about all those suffering with cancer, lost someone with cancer or battling with cancer themselves. My great-aunt died of breast cancer when I was just a child. My uncle who raised me as his own died of cancer when my son was just 3 months old. The pain of it all is still there -- some days better than others. For those that are dealing with anything I mentioned above, there is a healing for the soul. Each day is filled with surprises, disappointments and other things we all probably would care to forget. I would like to remind you (whoever is reading) that despite that, let love, peace, generosity and serving others take over each day. We are put on this earth to serve others whether you want to do it or not. It is not all about us. I know...I know...it's not a perfect world, but YOU can have a perfect world for yourself and build around yourself. Life is something else so why not enjoy the time you have. Pray for others dealing with cancer, kidney disease, liver disease, heart problems, etc. Healing is on the way!

NKF (National Kidney Foundation)

My husband, son and I participated in the Kidney Walk on Saturday, June 6th at St. Louis University. We were overwhelmed by the numbers that came out to support. I set a goal of $300 for donations and exceeded that. It was very exciting. We are still doing well and just grateful for each day. I must admit that I was a little disheartened last week. I noticed all the promoting for the Susan Komen Walk and very little talk of the Kidney Walk. This is not to say that cancer is not an increasing problem in our community, but I felt like this cause was being overlooked. I am much better this week after participating. I am grateful for all those that donated, walked and prayed for the cause. Also, God doesn't always bless us in numbers and I understand that. The walk was such a rewarding experience and allowed us to see our blessing. There were those that are on dialysis waiting for a kidney, waiting to be healthy and it made us see it in a somewhat difficult way. Although my husband is feeling good now, we remember the impact the illness has had on our family and we will continue to support the cause, pray for those waiting and be an inspiration to others. Why don't you join us next year?

Putting it into Perspective

It has been 8 weeks since the transplant. I am feeling so much better, my husband is feeling so much better and things are starting to feel normal again. Although last week I had outpatient surgery because of some tests that came back irregular when testing for the kidney. God still blessed me and my family because the tests were negative. I have to ask God not to allow me to lose sight of the fact that he bought us out of this. My husband is healthy again and I am not leaving work to go to the hospital. However, there are others who are in the hospitals with illnesses and those who are going through something that you are not able to visibly see. I just have to thank God for touching our lives and blessing us. There isn't a day that I don't just say thank you Jesus! We should all put things into perspective. Don't yell at your kids for something stupid, don't leave the house mad, don't hold grudges and don't forget the blessings. Always have fun, always live life to the fullest and always tell those you love that you love them.

The Gift of life

I never thought of it as the gift of life. As we shared the news with people, that was the comment I heard the most. Selfless, great, a miracle, wonderful and a gift of life. I can't say that I believe it was a miracle. I do believe it was a blessing though. I believe that God gave us a challenge and watched to see how we would handle it. I got weak some days and so did he. Our son was tired because of it, but it was the best thing that probably could have happened. It's funny saying that, but its true. You cherish life a little better. Minor things don't mean as much and you only want people around that are true to you and really love you. You don't like wasting time and you look at every situation differently. When you go through something like this as the spouse, it also gives you a different type of patience. Something I have always lacked. Some people faded, but some people really supported us. God told me not to depend on people though, just rely on him and seek him. When and if I got lonely or misunderstood -- I prayed to my God. The God that made it possible for me to be a match for my husband. It has been almost a month since the transplant. I feel good and so does my husband. With the exception of a little soreness and tiredness, I couldn't feel better. Life -- you never know where it takes you, the obstacles you'll face, the people you'll meet and the joys and pains. Life after the transplants.

The tests

I wanted to do something to help my husband. I asked the doctors and Darion "what can I do." They said that I could be tested, but that I would have to go through a series of tests. I could be eliminated immediately if my blood was not a compatible match. I went through all the tests required -- the blood tests, ekg, urinalysis, x-ray, ct scan, session with a psychiatrist, review of a powerpoint presentation, and had to exhibit that I was mentally, financially and emotionally ready for the surgery. In November 2008, I received a call at the end of the day at work that I was a match. I cried. I called Darion and told him that he was getting a kidney from me. He was ecstatic. He was sitting in the dialysis center as I shared this news with him. I called his younger sister with the news and she began to cry and thank me. What a joy!!! What a joy!! We thanked God and just prayed. Date? What is the date he asked....December 8th, the day after your 30th birthday. We both wanted it to be earlier because he had been in and out of the hospital almost every week for a month and a half. As a matter of fact, the doctors had to remove the transplanted kidney just 2 weeks prior to the transplant because it was causing him so many problems. He was so strong after going through a rough summer.

The months following the illness

The doctors said that Darion would be eligible to do to peritoneal dialysis, which would allow him to continue working. PD dialysis can be performed over night as the patient sleeps. They performed an outpatient surgery to insert the catheter for the dialysis and said they would not be able to start the dialysis for two-three weeks. During that time, he became more ill and had more complications. He was able to do PD dialysis for one week before the swelling in his body began. The doctors decided to put an access in (catheter) for hemo dialysis because his body was filling with toxins since the kidney was not functioning. This required the placement of a catheter in a different location. It was hard seeing all the tubes and cuts all over from his stomach up to his chest and neck. He had to start going to dialysis three days a week. Meanwhile, I had used up all of my personal time at work and was going to school for my Masters. It was really difficult because most nights I didn't sleep. I didn't want to complain to others, but keep my faith. I just prayed and prayed and the support of friends, the church and family was definitely a blessing. Additionally, my good friend Tanya was going through the exact same thing -- only it was her sister. I would call her to vent about different things and she understood. We exchanged our experiences quite often. Darion's dad had come back into his life and was very supportive. He told Darion that he wanted the doctors to take his failed kidney and put it inside of him while Darion took his only functioning kidney. Can you believe that? His dad was willing to go on dialysis for the sake of his son.